Working Together is the Key

I'll keep it short this week, last week I took Monday off to enjoy and celebrate 24 years of marriage to my lovely wife. As I reflect on 24 years of marriage from a financial perspective, we have raised 3 wonderful boys, purchased 12 vehicles (I think), 2 homes, renovated 2 basements, and managed several upgrades to our houses. All of that while accumulating over a $1.7 million net worth. We have done it all together with a focus on what was best at that given moment. Did we make some mistakes? Sure did, but we did those all together.

It all starts with working together and keeping in sync from the time we first moved in together after we got married, through moves across the country, and currently into the area of PA we have lived in for the past 20 years. In the early stages, we were managing rent, moving every 8 months, and building our life together. Sure we spent our fair share at the local Starbucks on a nightly walk in California, but never in excess. As we had kids, we had to prioritize their needs and determine what the cost was going to be for diapers, sports, and other additional activities. During this time I never paid much attention to investments, just let it continue to invest regularly from the time I started working at the age of 22.

When we purchased our first home, it was a new build. We ended up choosing a home that gave me about an hour's commute but opened up more possibilities for us, including lower property taxes and prices, with more homes. As we picked the colors throughout, we did it together, so much so that the realtors told us they had never seen couples so agreeable on everything. We made some mistakes in the early days, including an interest-only mortgage, which I have written about, but it all worked out, and we did it together. Renovations and large purchases were planned each year, what did we want to do and what was most important.

As the kids were born we faced the choice of moving or renovating our house to accommodate an extra room. We initially considered moving, but ultimately after talking to a few realtors decided to renovate the house, which was a wise move for a few years. That renovation added value to the house and enabled us to easily move a few years later into the home we are in now. During the years in that first house, Shea gave birth to 3 kids, we managed karate lessons, baseball, and a host of other activities. All of which we signed up for together, sacrificed in some areas to open up opportunities in another.

As we are both in our mid-40s now, we are looking at 2 boys in High School and 1 halfway through his Junior year of college. It makes us start thinking more about that future. Plan for what is ahead and think about what matters to us at this point. As I noted, we have accumulated a solid nest egg overall. Our outlook looks good to enable us to live how we want to live in the future, but more importantly, it opens up the opportunity to work together even more, just in a different way.

I say all this to remind you about your journey. It is about celebrating each of the periods or seasons of your life. Realize they are not forever and some may be difficult while in the moment. Do not forget about the future during this time. Most importantly, do it together with your husband or wife. Talk together about your current season of life as well as your future season. It will change how you make decisions today.

If you are not on the same page, now is the time to start working together. Go out for dinner, go for a walk, and start talking! Lack of communication is the number one killer of any relationship.

"Can two walk together, except they be agreed"

Amos 3:3