What Do Your Habits Say About You?

Stop just for a minute and think of just 1 healthy habit you have and then think of 1 unhealthy habit you have.

Chances are that did not take you too long to come up with. We are creatures of habits, they help us to move through activities easily without using our brain to figure them out. I’ve been reading the book Brain Rules By John Medina and one thing he calls out is that habits allow our brain to go on auto-pilot and relax. We do not have to think while we do them and our brain gets a chance to recover. So in some ways habits are a good thing. They prepare our mind for what is to come and how you are going to approach that activity.

Now I started this by talking about good habits and bad habits because it is no surprise that not all habits are good for us. I was talking to my kids and friends the other day about smoking. There was once a time that it was so normal in our country that every car came with a cigarette lighter and it was common to go into a restaurant and have to ask for a non-smoking section. Now, we know that this is a bad habit overall and I won’t get into that on why, but the funny thing as my buddy and I recalled there were groups of kids that hung out together in High School who were all smokers. You see the habit of smoking defined that group of kids. They were known as the smokers and it carried certain ideas about them.

What habits do you have that define you? This idea of habits flows through in all aspects of our lives from our friends to our finances, activities, leadership, work, etc. Then once you know those habits, the follow up question to that is how does it define you? Do people know you for your habits?

Chances are you may not realize it but some people clearly know you by your habit, whether you like it or not. If it is a bad habit they know you by, the question then comes back to how do you change that.

The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg is a great read on this subject, along with Atomic Habits by James Clear. Both of them cover how we develop habits and ways to break them or change them. I for one, would love to change my bad habit of nail biting. Now I’m a professed occasional picker, not one of those people that constantly has his hands in his mouth, but I know it is a bad habit. I believe it was Duhigg who shares a story about someone dealing with this particular issue. The solution was to get a manicure. Now for a man to get a manicure is not common but this does happen. The very aspect of getting manicure regularly helped to change this man’s perception of his hands, that now the thought of biting or picking at them stopped him from doing it. Add to that the cost of the manicure and you have a reason to change. After several months of getting a manicure this man loved his hands and broke the habit of biting his nails.

Now manicures cannot solve our problems for all our habits but there are hacks and ways to adjust our habits, no matter what they are. The question points back to us and are we really ready to change our habits or do we really want to change our habits, whatever they may be. You are in control to change, but you are going to need to get fed up with them and put in some guardrails and actions to help you change.

Specifically in my area, your habits will define you no matter what you think. If budget is an issue for you, controlling spending then it is time to look at the things that make you spend money. Think about what would change your behavior and prevent you from spending money in different areas. If you have a tendency to go to the mall and buy things you really do not need but want (shoe closet, clothing, electronics) then make it hard for you to buy them. Do not bring the Credit/Debit card with you and/or only bring the amount of cash you have allocated to spend in this area. If Amazon is your clutch, then cancel Amazon Prime. I did this earlier this year and I can tell you that I have ordered significantly less stuff and have not sacrificed price when I needed something. Believe it or not most of the stuff on Amazon I can get for about the same price or better anywhere else, with free shipping and without the added 100+ a month.

From a leadership perspective, what habits are making you a better leader. Another book I just finished up is the Genius Habit. This goes through several great leaders and the habits they have from getting the right amount of sleep, exercise regiment, getting dressed and just about everything in between. One things that really hit home for me was sleep. People today tend to brag on their lack of sleep, hours worked, etc. and then will drink coffee all day and brag on their coffee intake. This is not healthy and is actually making us less effective. Sleep is a critical habit, one that I have not given enough attention to in the past. I’ve shared with many how I fell asleep at the wheel one time, thankfully rubbed a guardrail and no one was hurt. This literally woke me up and helped me to realize the need to prioritize my sleep. While my family may not like me going to bed at 9 or 9:30, when I wake up at 4:30 it is critical that I am in bed and ready for a full night’s sleep so I am at my best. More information on sleep see Matt Walker’s book, Why We Sleep (FANTASTIC READ).

Let’s take some time to examine ourselves and our habits good and bad, if you like share some below with others, the good, the bad and the ugly. To get started here are mine, some of which I mentioned above.

Bad Habits:

• Nail biting

• Quick Judgement

• Scrolling my Phone

• Not Sleeping enough

• Cookies…if they are around I eat them, bad habit…

Good Habits:

• Reading the Bible and Prayer

• Working out 4-5 days a week

• Writing/Journaling a few times a week

• Telling my family I love them

• Budgeting monthly

• Investing regularly

• Reading

Habits I’ve thought about Starting or have tried

• Standard Dress (I’m kind of envious of Steve Jobs attire and enjoyed my COVID lock down of my rotating T-Shirts everyday. Going back to the office I’ve got to dress up more again and have thought about just going to a standard daily outfit to simplify decisions)

• Daily Journaling: Actually really love doing this. I write these posts as part of a weekly activity, but just a personal journal is helpful to get things out of my head.